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Two Years In LA

November 21, 2012

Tomorrow, I will have lived in Los Angeles for two years, exactly. I assume, and forgive me if I’m being naive, that 95% of you will be seventeen hors d’oeuvres, six cocktails, and one too many bites of Turkey too full to read any blogs tomorrow, so I thought I’d post now.

I got here just a few days before Thanksgiving those two years ago and it seems like a world away, now. I’d never lived anywhere other than NY or NJ for more than three and a half months! Talk about living in a fishbowl. Two years and four apartments (really? Jeez.) later, I feel like I can finally call LA home.

As an exercise in summation, I will give you What I’ve Learned in my Two Years in LA:

  • If it’s raining, drive like you’re sixteen and you stole you Dad’s BMW out of the garage [my dad does not have a BMW], aka: VERY SLOWLY. I learned this the hard way with a rear-ender on Highland Blvd and a broken foot.
  • Always have a business card on you. And don’t be shy about giving it out. It feels disgusting and cheesy every time, but it’s probably worth it.
  • Only go to Runyon Canyon if you want your hike to resemble a Lululemon dog-walk fashion show. Get lost in Griffith Park if you want to get real exercise. Go off-trail in Altadena if you want to have a near death experience.
  • Put an extra hour on your parking meter at all times. The $1 is worth saving $58.
  • On that note: read parking signs, set meter alarms, take photos of any sign that says the word “tow” in it. And if you leave your car somewhere for more than one day, check on it. Learned this one the hard way, too. (You’re welcome for the $1,000+ donation to the city I’ve made in these two years in tow fees and parking tickets).
  • Get a California Driver’s License. Trust me. Your car WILL get impounded while you are in it and you will have to take a cab home in the middle of the night from Koreatown and the cop will NOT be nice.
  • Fight all of your tickets. I’ve saved myself $1,800 this way. Seriously. (Also, I will represent you in traffic court if you want…I seem to get away with everything…shhhhhh)
  • Get a job and be friends with your co-workers. Otherwise you probably will not make friends. That guy in your building is weird.
  • At The Grove, park at The Farmer’s Market, validate parking and then after two hours, pull your car out and back in, repeat. Free parking.
  • Trader Joes in Silverlake is a tattoo show. And Adam Scott will occasionally peruse the bean aisle. You don’t know him from your personal life, he is Adam Scott. Stop staring like he was in your improv class.
  • Don’t drink and drive. And if you do…learn the back roads. And if you get pulled over follow that finger fucking well.
  • You will not get your security deposit back. Just don’t expect to. That being said, don’t move anymore.
  • Cell service is 2003 style: spotty and unreliable.
  • Work twice as hard as everyone you meet here. Three times as hard as 1/2 of them. Four times as hard as anyone you’ve met whose career is more advanced than yours.
  • Go home as much as you can.

Have a safe, healthy (within reason), and very happy Thanksgiving!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. November 21, 2012 12:20 PM

    Great post, Adria. Happy LA anniversary!

  2. November 21, 2012 6:31 PM

    Happy American Thanksgiving. And be safe on the road – this post makes me worry about you and I hardly know you!

  3. November 29, 2012 10:09 PM

    Wow, I feel like I was just reading about your big move to LA. I can’t believe you’ve been there two years already. Congrats on surviving Los Angeles for that long.

    I love your little list. Reminds me why I don’t want to move to LA. Haha. Portland has ruined me – I think I’m too laid back to ever live anywhere else. 😛

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